Here are a couple of things to consider, IMO. First, from what I've read, you've got specialized skills, and "settling" for marginal jobs is not a good idea, guilt/starvation notwithstanding. Second, how you feel about yourself will eventually outweigh how you feel about working a shit job for peanuts.

I worked for fifteen years for the State of Oregon, and at first, I loved the job. I learned new skills, got very good at what I did (and also, because I asked a lot of questions, I got good at what everyone else did, too), and as a result, had more responsibility heaped upon me. No position upgrade, no raises. I ended up with two supervisors who didn't talk to each other, and they fought (in a very dignified, silent manner) over me. I was to the point where I would throw up in the parking lot every morning before I even got through the doors. And if I was lucky enough to make it into the building without barfing, I'd still have to beeline to the bathroom.

NOT a good situation. I cried all the time, had the shakes, and every little noise made me jump out of my skin, metaphorically. I finally had to quit. I lost benefits and stuff, but my sanity was more important at that point.

Now, I water plants at a local nursery/greenhouse for $6.75 an hour. It's hard work, but I love it. I don't answer to anyone, I make my own hours, I spend time with birds, bees, turtles, fish, flowers, shrubs and trees, and when I'm done, I'm in a peaceful place. It's not full-time and it's not a year-round job, but it's exactly what I need to get myself back in balance.

Maybe when my Zen-job is over, I'll be less fragile and more able to get back into the rat-race. For now, though, I'm okay with the bare necessities, because I've got a tranquility that I'd never have otherwise. "Pity this busy monster man unkind not. Progress is a comfortable disease..."

I think you're right, I'm going to try to be more choosy about what I apply for this time around. Because I've got the money to support myself for a little while (even if it is DAMN frustrating watching my entire life's savings dwindle to nothing) but I only have eight more months guaranteed in this country.

Hang in there! The job market sucks everywhere right now. I'm sure that you'll find something -- I don't know much about your particular field, so I feel like all I can offer is general motivational support. So please consider it offered ..

And as for living with parents again, well, I'm living that dream. Oh what a dream it is!

Thank you, I feel very generally supported. :)

That sucks, sweetie! Job hunting process is the worst... You need a lot of nerves and patience. I do hope you get to find something soon, and something that is just perfect for you. Hang in there and try not to let it get to you too much...

Thanks, babe, appreciate it. How's your job working out?

It's been doing really well! I got used to working there in just a week or so, so it feels like I've been working there for ages already. It's not too challenging or stressful, but it's still interesting, and I like the work atmosphere, I think it suits me perfectly. Everything about my job is perfect, except the fact that it's not a permanent one *g* it will suck so much when the last day comes...

Thanks for asking :)

That does sound pretty perfect, not stressful but also not boring. That's a difficult combination to find sometimes.

I got your comment on my latest entry, but I deleted it because I talked to my mom and felt better and it just seemed silly to have it hanging out there. I really appreciate what you said though, you were pretty much dead on about everything!

This whole 'being a grown-up' thing is vastly overrated and not entirely working out the way I'd hoped.

Truer words have never been spoken, hon. Life can be really ordinary, and job searching a severe stressor.

Hope something turns up.

*hugs or bum kicks, depending on your mood, but given with care*

Thank you, I feel very careful kicked and/or hugged. :) You changed your name! When did you do that?